Did you ever play Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater and thought “man, I wish this was 100% dorkier and way less enjoyable of an experience”? BOY HOWDY DO WE HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU!
Uncle Dave falls on a grenade and plays a game in the Army Men franchise so you may be spared the horrors of plastic war.
Duke Nukem’s paid Christmas expansion replaced coal as the stocking stuffer for bad children in 1997 
Barney may love you, but his game don’t.
I know you need more games for your Zapper, but… uh… maybe not this one.
Another platform game based on a public domain title gets… real weird.